All I Hear is Weddng Bells

It's stupid. I know. I have so much going on in my life, so many GOOD things going on, and this stupid thing keeps popping up. Marriage. Getting hitched. Tying the note. Ball and chain. With a lot of my classmates getting married I've begun to feel some of that pressure. I've been with LG for over 3 years now (holy crap!) and when girls who haven't been with their man for very long get hitched before I do I get jealous. But why should I be?

I have an incredible life. I'm living in the beautiful Bay Area just a ferry ride away from bustling San Francisco. I am at a great paying job, with amazing bosses. My family loves me, and do so many things. I have an incredible boyfriend, who even though I've been amazingly mad at is starting to shape up his act. I have family all over the place, people I'll call my family even though we aren't blood related. And they support me through thick and thin.

Yet I feel I must hide this feeling deep inside me. Even from my love. Because I feel I have trapped myself. I sat for so long and said how I wanted to go to school, wanted to better myself. While these things are true, I have developed new wants. I know that I must wait for these things, and that good things DO come to those who wait. I know that we have many things to do, like him getting more financially stable, and getting his debt paid. I'm willing to wait. Just don't judge me for knowing what my center pieces are going to look like, or what food I'm serving my guests. I'm a super planner as my mother has always pointed out. And even though I do understand a wedding would be atleast if not more than a year away, I a going to have basically everything ready for the day he says "Marry me?"